So You Seek The (Spiritual) Truth?: Healing, Denials, and More!

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So you seek the truth? You seek a deeper understanding of life and the realization of it not being as "black-and-white" as society portrays it. You turn to spiritual books, spiritual gurus, mantras, and spiritual trends for answers, but you begin to see that it take much more than these things to commit to a spiritual journey. You realize this and you think to yourself, "Am I on the right path? Am I doing this the wrong way? IS there a right way?" You begin to entrap yourself in mixed emotions of anger, confusion, sadness, and even loneliness. You begin to demean yourself and make yourself feel that you are not enough or that your efforts are meaningless. Coming from someone who's been on their spiritual journey for more than two years now, I can tell you that I have felt those things tenfold. You feel as if you hit rock bottom as if the world is caving in. However, this is all a part of seeking the truth. It is not as glamorous as it is portrayed. Seeking the truth can get dirty and murky, as you are finding things out about life and yourself that you do not particularly like. It's okay! That is a part of discovering the path that is unique to you. 

Depending on how you view your spiritual journey, it can either be the most fulfilling time of your life, or your worst nightmare. It is preferable to shift your thoughts to the former, as it can help you when you fall on hard times in life (which is expected). Another thing that factors into seeking the truth is denial? Why denial? Many tend to deny that they are in need of healing for numerous reasons. One is that they feel that they are good spaces in their lives, and they tend to put their darkest memories and traumas in the back on their minds. No matter how long one is able to internalize their darkest memories and traumas, they are both able to come out in unexpected ways. Another way a person can be in denial of needing healing is their verbal defense of it. For instance, someone may say, "I don't need healing! That's for the birds!" In all honesty, I feel that they are most in need of healing, especially if their response is brash. Denying yourself the spiritual healing can hinder your self-discovery and you could continue habits that keep you from addressing past traumas. 

Seeking the truth - whatever it may be for you - can be one of the most fulfilling things that can ever happen to you, but you must have resiliency and a sense of self in order to see this. As mentioned earlier, seeking the truth and going on your spiritual journey forces you to dig down deep and confront even your most tempting desires. I am not saying that all of our deepest desires are "evil" or "sinful", I am saying that we may find out things about yourself that may come as a shock. In my personal experience, I am learning about myself sensually, in which I am finding things that are arousing to me such as masturbation and erotic literature. And you know what? I am surprisingly comfortable with this. It really amazes me that when you dig deep within yourself, you do not always know what you will find. This is just one of the many things you can look forward to in regards to your spiritual journey/awakening, and I can go for eons about the spiritual journey because for everyone who endeavors on this path, there will many things that are unique for that person. 

This is just a snippet of what's to come in regards to my studies on spirituality, as I am getting deeper into my own self-study. I am finding out many things that I can hopefully write on this blog about. Until next time folks, I got a lot of writing coming your way! Today's End of Blog Song is "Mercy, Mercy Me (The Ecology)" by the late great Marvin Gaye!